A Blog Called Nowhere

No No Spitting around here! We've always liked saliva and now we know why.
Natural-born painkiller found in human saliva

We've been enjoying reading The Planets by Dava Sobel. last night we learned that diamonds are constantly being created in Jupiters skys, weird hu. Sobel tells us that a proper scale model of the solar system, using a bowling ball for the sun, would represent the 8,000-mile-wide earth with a peppercorn placed 78ft distant from the ball (it's impossible to get a sense of the distance between the planets when you look at pictures like this one). Also on our things to do list, The Hayden Planetarium has an interactive tour of the universe lecture on the first Tuesday of each month called Tuesdays in The Dome. Check out the planeterium schedual here.

David Scher opened at Pierogi Gallery last night. Fanfrickentastic show! I first came across Davids work in the early 90's when he was doing installations of scattered drawings, paintings and sculptures at Jack Tilton gallery. he began scaling up the paintings a few years ago (the painting shown here is 60"x84") and they just get better and better. The centerpiece is a painting called Practice World It shows a city scape becomming one infinite building like Pieter Bruegel's Tower of Bable. It's elegant and humorous, slightly abject, with pitch perfect color, and a delicate touch that's very much Scher's signature mark. There is something in the manner David paints which reminds me of Maurice Pendergast or Vuillard. The picture is drawn with a wash of a warm grisalle and then details are scumbled back into the picture with a light touch. Practice World is a beautiful painting and I dig the idea David is dealing with "that this “might just be practice for something else or...that through drawing the world one learns the world.” Nice. Congrats David.

It's dark days for mankind!
Some thugs or thuglettes broke into the Jammy Jar by violently smashing the drivers side window and then preceeded to rifle thru the glove compartment and stole an ipod and our collection of quaters.
Pictured here is Mrs. Cub, feeling the pain.

(oddly the robbery robbers did not steal the 6 foot tall Swatch watch in the back seat!)

Friday evening invocation

A petition to the G-ddess from the porch of ABCN to you gentle reader. May the big lady on the ball cast dried flowers and other decomposed remnants of organic material your way!

Japan Issues Tsunami Warning After Quake

By THE ASSOCIATED PRESS
Published: November 15, 2006

Filed at 8:25 a.m. ET

TOKYO (AP) -- Five small tsunamis hit northern Japan late Wednesday, estimated at no larger than 16 inches high, Japan's Meteorological Agency said.

A few minutes later, a second wave of 8 inches hit the nearby port city of Kushiro to the southwest, the agency said. More on this riveting story on the tiny tsunamis

Join ABCN on a stroll through the gallery of 70's car interiors, won't you?

We're driving back to the Upstate Institution as we do every fricken Tuesday where the Jammy Jar gets to commune with nature.

Our reintroduction to yoga has left us barely able to walk. The Mrs. is also not walking so well these days due to RLP
so we've ordered these stylish walker chairs from Pottery Barn (accessories like the brochure holder avalible at J.Crew)

MMMMM, warm milky paint!

Q: What does D.H. Rumsfeld and Jean Cocteau have in common?

A: The Blood of a Poet!

In 2003 Hart Seely of Slate magazine posted the now classic Poetry of D.H. Rumsfeld.
In a tribute to the outgoing secretary of defence we repost these poetic works for your consideration.

The Unknown-
As we know,
There are known knowns.
There are things we know we know.
We also know
There are known unknowns.
That is to say
We know there are some things
We do not know.
But there are also unknown unknowns,
The ones we don't know
We don't know.

—Feb. 12, 2002, Department of Defense news briefing

Glass Box
You know, it's the old glass box at the—
At the gas station,
Where you're using those little things
Trying to pick up the prize,
And you can't find it.
It's—
And so you keep dropping it
And picking it up again and moving it,
But— of you are probably too young to remember those—
Those glass boxes,
But— they used to have them
At all the gas stations
When I was a kid.

-6, 2001, Department of Defense news briefing

Happenings-
Your going to get told lots of things
You get told things every day that don't happen.
doesn't seem to bother people, they don't—
It's printed in the press.
The world thinks all these things happen.
They never happened.
Before in fact the story's there
That the world is constantly being fed
Things that haven't happened.
I can tell you is,
It hasn't happened.
It's going to
happen.

Baby names were the topic of conversation over the weekend. ABCN's very own Selectman Mikey Iveson contributed severly to this list.

Girls
––––––
Quametris
Madora
Aro
Glendora
Eisenman
Kings-Highway
Yacht
Palmina
Phonetica
Connecticut
Castle
Roulette
Pluto
Beige
Dresden-Donut
Pete-kate
Dauphine
Delphine
Seyrig
Marchioness
Rumsfeld
Unisex
Rye

Boys
––––––
Van
Von
Hamlet
Chelmsford
Chumsford
Chumley
Trey
Tré
New Mexico
Omlet
Womelet
Sñotion (named after the new ocean, Sontion Ocean)
Ochre
Phosphorescent
Synalgos
Ethanol
Hyrdogen
Sphene
Pylon
Dastardly
Sontag
Tag

We'll be giving haircuts to all the Clients at the Upstate Facility today. I'm doing everything in my power to make my class look like this.

We will be back tomorrow to discuss the media's recent love affair with the art world. Your homework assignment is to review the new Vanity Fair "art issue" featuring "renowned artist Robert Wilson's groundbreaking take on portraits in the 21st century"

I may not actually

Visualize GOD as a gigantic donut like Energy Matrix of Consciousness within which lie nested a series of donut -like matrices of energy ... read more about god and donuts and water conciousness and love portholes here...

Memo from the Health Desk:

Arm Deskercises!

An Apple a Day
This "apple picker" stretch relieves tension in your arms, sides and waist. It feels great when done slowly and smoothly, so take your time and dont rush it. Perform the stretch first thing in the morning and periodically throughout the day.

Stretch your arms up, one at a time, as high as you can, as if reaching to pick an apple out of a tree. Repeat 10 times, alternating sides.

Artist of the Day: Dan Perjovschi lives and works in Bucharest. He did a massive wall drawing project at the Tate Modern this past spring, covering 4 walls of a room with comic social commentary. We particularly like Sponsors are bad, curators are bad, directors are bad, artists are good. !

What does the Gaylord Rehibilitation Center and Boadwee Blog have in common? How about a love of Dory Previn* and both of them turning me onto the song, Lady With a Braid. Gaylord aptly called it the most passive agressive love song ever sung.

Lady With a Braid appears on one of the best compilation CDs I've picked up in a long time, The Trip by Jarvis Cocker (of Pulp fame) it's ace beyond words, it's a double CD packed with juicy nuggets and worth every penny. Heres the Amazon link.

*LADY WITH A BRAID

would you care to stay till sunrise
it's completely your decision
it's just that going home is such a ride
going home is such a ride
going home is such a ride
going home is such a low and lonely ride

would you hang your denim jacket
near the poster by picasso
do you sleep on the left side or the right
would you mind if i leave on the light
would you mind if it isn't too bright
now i need the window open
so if you happen to get chilly there's this coverlet my cousin hand crocheted
do you mind if the edges are frayed
would you like to unfasten my braid

shall i make you in the morning
as cup of instant coffee
i will sweeten it with honey and with cream
when you sleep
do you have dreams? you can read the early paper
and i can watch you while you shave
oh god the mirror's cracked
when you leave
will you come back?
you don't have to answer that at all
the bathroom door is just across the hall
you'll find an extra towel on the rack
on the paisley patterned papered wall there's a comb on the shelf
i papered that wall myself
that wall myself

would you care to stay till sunrise
it's completely your decision
it's just the night cuts through me like a knife
would you care to stay awhile and save my life?
i don't know what made me say
that i've got this funny sense of humor
you know i could not be downhearted it i tried
it's just that going home is such a ride
going home is such a ride
going home is such a ride
isn't going home is such a low and lonely ride?