A Blog Called Nowhere

i would beat my clone with a bristly brush. not. i would make it come here to new beige. it's okay if it's part dumb. that might be better in fact.
 

Yeah, I'm at the upstate institutional today, what an utter waist of time, totally a job for zombie-clone. I will teach it stock phrases like "nice use of the color red" and "drawing is the cornerstone of painting"

Luckily WW is coming up today to break up the monotony!
 

waist=waste
 

can you send ww to my new beige after she is done at the institution? i would like her to bring some of the brown also.
 

i would like to be stuffed in a burlap sack today and dragged out of here against my will. can you guys come and help me?
 

FB, it's too bad that the Team Shredder surf van is probably being put out to pasture because I think it would make the ideal abduction vehicle for the above scenario. You know, it's kinda run down looking, no windows in the back, door handles don't quite work right, which makes for a difficult escape. Oh well. I'm sure WW and Corny can come up with something...
 

Can I be the lute player in the folk band?
 

Just got out of Faculty Meeting. Oi. There was nothing on the adjenda except for airing complaints about how the institution secretly hates our department so things like broken bathrooms dont get fixed. We decided if we all quit together no one would notice, not even the clients.

Fb, dont despair, I will send WW over tuit suite along with a clone for kidnapping senario. Clone is good at knots and brainwashing. You will be folk dancing with pleasure in no time.
 

if i had clones i would shrink them really really small and put them in a space ship and send them into the heart of the surf van to cure its ills and when they got back out i'd send them to china and relieve all the serf painters working in china who copy western paintings ad send them on vacation to Prague and then i'd send images of my paintings to them so they could clone my paintings
 

Ghandi, you are the selfless one among us. Bless your soul.
 

oh god corny i hope i didn't disappoint at the instutution today. sorry i said that you said that sculpture is something you bump into when you're trying to look at painting. i became very dumb half-way thru. i am a formalist? huh? i do not have concepts? i scare myself.

i am home now listening to my daily recording of dog anxiety. it's how i relax.
 

You are kidding right Dubz? You were excelent, smooth as butter, really
verbal and analytical, I found it enlightning. Your work has a sense of humor that is spot on, also most interesting was seeing more old work that shit is HOT! You MUST post more of that stuff from the Marie Walsh art foundation days for peeps to see.

I'm sorry I introduced you as an artist prone to violence when drinking.
 

Not to say that your work is about being funny, but there is something sly in there...

The clients cant ask questions after because they have not been provided with the proper brain function for such demanding activity
 

i figured i'd lulled the clients into a deep ennui. or that they were perhaps too cynical to see the humor in my retardedness, and thought i was just dumbsville. you know, when i said the thing about being into bird shit and portholes and stuff like that. i shoulda laced it with some conceptual bullshit so they'd walk away thinking i was some sort of art fart. clients love that.
 

thanks for the compliments, corny. this morning i had the "omg what the fuck did i say that for?" feeling...

how about this: "i use black because i got a gallon of it for free" or "black is the new ochre" or some crap like that.
 

bird shit is the new black.

Please disentangle your brilliant self from the shame-spiral-go-round, clients eat up the artists talks (even if they r quiet) I garentee your work will make an impact on them. I'll report back next week when I return to find them all coping you. Also not to worry about this statement or that statement, it's impossible to describe ones work succintly during talks because you work (like you said) instinctually and the work functions on so many levels with multiple meanings. The bird shit thing is hilarious, no need to esplain yourself conceptually or if you feel thats missing you can flush it out next time.

It's interesting how different artists approach talks, Nicola Tyson read a pre written statement and didn't stray from it at all, Gelitin fucks each other during presentations...
 

i just wish i'd worn different pants. or no pants.
 

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