Wednesday, August 02, 2006

 
Dear God,
You generally seem like a good person but I've got to tell you, this heat is really chafing my boils! I know you gave mankind air conditioners which are helping me to not dissolve into a lumpy puddle of flesh, and I don't mean to question your supreme greatness but don't the the air conditioners add more to global warming and what do I do about this vicious cycle?

Please advise,
Your Pal,
Corny

Comments:
Dear Corn Cub,

As Supreme Ruler of the Universe and All Things, I must ask you to trust in my Mysterious Plan. This plan includes occasionally cranking up the heat so that lovely ladies like yourself get all glisteny and perspirey and such-like. Is that so much to ask, considering that I gave you life and the whole of creation to cavort about in?

But keep complaining! I'm really bored, planet earth seems pretty fucked up right now, and I'm considering my options...
 
i lived in the dirty south for years, but we always had central air. this is brutal. i hope "god" has a plan.
 
Flying Spaghetti Monster, If you want to see glistening ladies can't you just pull up a stool at your local Bada Bing club?
I'm tired of glistening. I remember you, you're cute but weird looking with those goofy eyeballs that stick up like antennas, right? If you turn me into a meatball I will cavort with you some.
 
The worlds a mess. I'm startig to think our so called god is a broken air conditioner.

That video link is mesmerizing. But I'm feeling manipulated by the accompanying music. Spiritual indian flutes and drums makes watching the end of the earth really sad, it's like come on, dont tell me how to feel!
 
I hear you. SERENITY NOW!! And to top it off, I get home tonight from the heat of NY and find a puzzle letter in the mail. ?? Clever, you say? i say annoying. I mean, I was way too lightheaded and hot to sit and put that thing together for a measly two-sentence message.
 
A puzzle letter, who is the offender? Do I need to call out Thunderpal?
 
THUNDERRRRRRRPAL! You need to get the sawed-off shotgun on this sucker. A Pacific Northwesterner (no offense Gaylord) now, but once a New Yorker, sent me the puzzle letter. Frustrating for someone like myself who needs to get things done.
 
oh, sorry about that, I farmed out that CGI project to an outside studio, and they "forgot" to get my okay on the audio. They're currently simmering in liquid shit up to their necks... upside down. I really hate that new-age shit.
 
i like puzzles. peeds, send it to me.
 
dubzers, are you still in town? for some reason i thought you were gone. come over and we'll do puzzles and eat ice cream.
 
can't sleep. too much heat in the house of dubz. i leave tomorrow. see everybody REAL soon. heartz.
 
FSM I knew you were my god for a reason, we both hate new age musics and your punishments are very exciting and creative and have literary resonance which gives you the touch of class i like in my Supreme Beings
 
Morn'n Peeds. Sorry to say Thunderpal is out in the pacific northwest conducting a gun decorating workshop at a survivalist training camp.
I think you may need to write this person back but shred the note into tiny pieces before mailing

I love the CD's! listened to them all day yesterday. Orange juice is great and the other CD is a gem parade. THANKS MAN!
 
***ATTENTION: NEW SONG OF THE WEEK***
 
Mornin' Corns. I am glad you like them. I tried in that mix CD to give you stuff you may not know, mostly.

I am slicing up my note to the Pacific Northwest. I believe the deli-slicer is too strong for such things.
oh, gotta listen to the song now....
 
Too drunk to fuck? Can't say I've had this problem, but sounds like a bad affliction.

If I remember correctly, we danced to this at camp.
 
pd, can you write a letter back to the puzzler, then rip it into shreds and stuff it into the envelope and send? Write in cursive.
 
corns, have you noticed that pd and sloths blogs are not working? is it just me? I need my fixes this morning, you know?
 
I am working on that now. I am writing it in Japanese (practicing) then cut it up and throw in a bunch of blank scraps and candy wrappers....
 
my blog works. unfortunately it is not a new post.
 
oh good pd. i was worried there.
 
I’ve taken to riding the subway all day and night. Not only is there great AC, but also the vibrations help me sleep and I find it to be a great place to meet people. Anyway, the way I figure, using public transport earns one A/C credits so which can be used can stay cool with a clean conscience.
 
too hot to fuck. tis true.
 
right fabeebs...too hot to fuck even on the subway.
 
? logworld has been up & running, fb... I haven't had any probs loading it, but I'll republish anyway.
 
is that true, PD? oops... heh.
 
sloth, your block is a black screen here at beige. weird.
 
I am embarrassed to admit that I recognize the "World Music" accompanying the world destruction as Peter Gabriel's soundtrack to the "Last Temptation of Christ." Sadly, it is written in the book of Revelation in the New Testament that the musical sound track to the End Times will be the combined oeuvres of Peter Gabriel and Phil Collins including (ironically) all of the back catalogs of Genesis. I am not happy about this but, what can one do -- it's in the Bible.
 
Whoa, I sure don't miss that nasty heat where people start stabbing eachother, but if it makes you feel any better Corny it was hot here in San Diego too for a few days, um....
 
TOMPAC ! I'm very very very excited about your recent ingress into the blogzone. (*chanting* we will make you one of us)
 
Adhoc love that you recognized that music, the same music they use in
yoga studios and birthing centers around the globe. Man, I got to read the bible one of these days it's just chock full of helpful info like what to put on the stereo come the apocolypse
 
Capt'n I've been stabbed like 17 times alreaty today. But drag when they hit vital organs.
 
Thanks Corny!
 
Stab or dance?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pv5zWaTEVkI
 
Corny, I'm an atheist, fyi.
 
Wonderful and informative web site. I used information from that site its great. film editing classes
 
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