Saturday, May 20, 2006

Wouldn't it be refreshing to wake up in a room with pictures like these on the walls? Here are some snaps from Susan and Michael Horts guest room, the greatest guest room in the world.

I couldn't care less about Elizabeth Payton's work but I put it in the pic below so to show the scale of the beautiful little Neo Rausch next to it. I've never seen Rausch work on a small scale and thought this painting was a gem.

Simon Watson gave a tour of the collection which he rehangs once a year. The Horts have over 2000 works, he picks out about two hundred to show. Their collection is far and away the greatest contemporary collection I've seen.

A Jim Lambie drawing hangs in the stairwell.

Felix Schramm made the instalation and sculpture below. The wall looks like it got wacked by a wrecking ball. The small sculpture has an off center record playing and it sounds insane. Thumbs up Felix Schramm, whoever you are.

I don't need to go to Peyton Place ever again--if you catch my meaning.

As for the Rausch--so beautiful. I wanna see it. It's like a lucious little corner of one of his huge paintings.
yeah Peyton Place is a bore, the Mamma Anderson show at Zwirner is a MUST SEE.
Oh, someone just told me to see that. I will go see Mamma.

I am have to say, I have been thinking of "Progress..." a lot these last couple of days. I'm gonna take a friend to see it next week.
I am have to say also that I just had mashed potatoes for breakfast.
These images look like what I imagine the guest room in Sea Monkey's mind is like.
I'm picturing seamonkeys guest room inside the shaft of a giant cat hair with a potato chip carpet.
Laughin' and agreein' up in here...!
i have never seen that rauch, but i love it. corny, you should have taken it.
"Felix, whoever you are?"

Someone's not reading James Wagner.
w.w. god, it was tempting, I was wearing my tight whore jeans yesterday, otherwise it would on gone straight into me pocket.

Barry, I been schooled.
corny, would you PLEASE tell mr. and mrs. hort about the "adopt-a-sloth" program that is also a BRILLIANT WORK OF CONTEMPORARY ART... i really don't want to go live with Saatchi, and the fucker is breathing down my tufted neck. Thank you.

p.s. were there donuts?
Slothity, Sloth!
Sloths there was a donut palace the size of the Taj Mahal, it was glistening and beautiful and radiant on the outside, claustrophobic on the inside what with the jelly filling and all.
PS. Sloths!!!! good to know you didn't get crushed under the house. Get back here!
that installation looks exactly how I feel right now--aka wrecked. spent the weekend with my new bipolar "boyfriend." I use quotes because I don't think boyfriend is the exact word, when he walks down the street and tells me about all the beautiful women in NYC he wants to fuck. opps, soory. is that dirty word allowed on this blog? Manic people are so exciting. it's hard to stay away, despite the danger he poses to my fragile psyche. We spent Saturday in PA driving down to see his psychiatrist. fun third date.
Dear Gentle Readers,

As a kind of salute to mainstream media, we here at ABCN engage in factless reporting whenever possible. I have no idea who painted the images I posted, I forget names of artists unless I've seen their shows and they make a big impact. I got an email inquiry this morning asking who painted the picture of the pirate leaning on the wood wall with the smoke face coming out of the bottle. Does anyone know who painted that one and what gallery they show with?

the Mutter museum in Philly is a must-see: cojoined triplets, a real-live human face with a six inch horn, fetus skeletons from every gestational stage, a gouty big toe, saggital brain slices, eyeball specimens of every shape and flavor, shrunken heads, detailed anatomic models from the 19th century. many more beautiful exhibits of organic and non-orgainic media...
Hey Anon, I LOVE that crazy museum! Did you see the tumor the size of a medicine ball and the flatfiles drawers full of stuff people swallowed and passed

rubber balls
fishing hooks
the doctor of that tumor patient let the lump stay in her so it could grow and break a world record. He got some noteriety...
I missed the tumor. I get a bit too much of that stuff on a daily basis. the ear bone collection is what really brought me to my knees. so clean and shiny! no yucky earwax to extract. I just wanted to take a whole bag of them home to put on display in my apartment.
maybe a phd in the history of medicine will be a legit way for me to curate my own "Anon museum of medical curiosities." better than the slave work I'm supposed to be doing right now...
Oh, that is a pirate? Geez, I thought it was a drunken clown.
My crotch emits 120 proof fumes, I'm the only drunken clown around here mardy b.
I remember freaking out at the world's largest colon at the Mutter. I guess it was only a model, like a soft sculpture, but still. It was like the size of the whole room. And the soap lady, too.
This pirate is emitting ghost vapors.
you'll be happy to hear that the colon is still hanging in there, dominating that whole room of the museum
Capt'n! The love knows no bounds. please to give Nigel and Saemonkee crushing squeezes
It was a semi-colon, I believe.
I love the colon as interior design element. Thinking swolen lymph glands as been bag chairs would really make a room.
Yes Corny! That is why I had my colon removed and it is draped over my sofa. It is a squishy pillow that I nestle in when watching Tony and Carmella.
Please check out my new line of decorative innards at Kmart. Have you ever tried sleeping on a pancreas?
The liver makes for great memory foam on the bed.
Corn, love to you, too, and I will squeez the chil'rens down the hall for ya...
I went to a chaple in Rome, the eternal city, which was decorated in bones. the gift show ruled.
Oh sapphire I know that place! Puttis made out of baby skulls with hip bone wings over the doors. Really expands the idea of how to live inside our bodies.
or something.
My grandma has an intestinal couch, but she keeps it covered in plastic so that there is no leakage.
delightfully disgusting VE
I suspected it might be disgusting, but this is all I've ever known. I just thought it was part of my grandma's many "sacrifices" for her grandchildren.
Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. There might be a mouse eating my brain tube.
Hi MM! Oh no, we must exterminate with plenty of nitrates!
exterminate with plenty of 120 proof spirits

and pills, black beauties and lots of them!
PDiddles. Are you diddling as you type? Is that possible?
Gimme them pills Corny. Fix them into my sweaty palm please. I'll lend you my stained overalls.....
The national police reassignment task force is coming to enforce bitter stings on my tongue. They are threatening to replace me with a bra.
Just thought I would let you know. In case something happens to me you will know who to call.
I am going to keep peeing in Corny's comment box until someone sprays me. I refuse to be neutered.
Where is Gene? How is she? Please send her my regards in the form of a pencil.
I will slip you some oxy-quell.
I am so diddly right about now, frogs.
PD, my grandmother had an apartment in brooklyn, every inch was covered in plastic. She had china piled up in display cabinates which shook when you walked by them, really the most oppressive apartment of all time. The chandelier was chrystal and I'd get totally high staring at it for hours during passover and stuff. I woulda much prefered your grandmothers apartment. Is it too late for your family to adopt me?
I'm so imbarassed, while I'm waxing on about my stupid childhood tramas you kids are having a hoedown
I would like to be adopted by PD's family too. I will do the dishes. I swear.
Corns your traumas mean more to me than my tongue. Pats.
Corns, I had everything but the traumatic, creepy crystal. Your gramps had creep conciousness?

I will adopt all of you!
thanks frogs licking you is like staring into the crystal chandelier
ok, but I call the big sunny bedroom. OK? Pd do you mind moving your stuff down to the basement?
Geez, Corns, I don't know 'bout that. There are some creepy-crawlies down there. But I guess I'll sacrifice the huge sunny room for you special folks. Just don't touch the rifle under the bed.
stop your worries. That seems like a non sequitur but it wasn't.

Steamy? you aint seen NOTHING madry. Now drop and gimme 20.
Big rifle? I like you people.
A lot.
Non-secular? Didn't you just mention passover?
Hey pd, i got a tech question:

Do you or anyone out there know how to load MP3s on to the blog? I wanna post songs from my itunes that people can link to.
You so funny Corns! I know about mp3s, but when it comes to doing fancy links on the blogs...I am really stupid. I bet Slothers or FB know. Or Krixfort should know it for sure.
Anonymous 10:32 this boyfriend is bringing shame to both the polyamorous and batshit communities. He must be covered in plastic until he uses his OCD for good (organizing your spice rack) not evil (objectifying other ladies).
Anon, I somehow missed your comment...
thank you kelli for picking it out and responding. Anon 10:32, just remember, easy does it girlfriend. A third date to Philly to see the shrink might be a red flag? Though are you the same anon who went to the Mutter museum? Must be. That is romantic, I took Mrs.Cub there on our first weekend away when we were dating.
it worked.
The Mutter museum always works I think. It is one of those aphrodisiac insanity places. Good luck anon, your new bf sounds like a real something.
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