Wednesday, February 01, 2006

 
There is a lot of complex action taking place at the refinery, we are handeling many perplexing cases at once, but sparing no efforts to MAKE IT HAPPEN. Upper management is comming by early, balloons will be floated tires will be kicked.

Comments:
say corny,
what in the hell is that? who made it, like someone;s nephews or....
 
yes its possible anon that someones nephew or a bunch of nephews made this drawing. It is from japan. That is all I know. The studio assistants seem to be working, playing, cleaning and beating eachother up with Kung-fu.
 
I'm honest with my studio assistant that her job is to drink coffee with me & humor my self-delusions. I got her wasted at that opening & then felt bad. Some mentor.
 
does Keith Tyson make any of his work himself, like can he draw?
 
Will this be covered in the BRAIN UPGRADE class we have signed up for at The Leanring Annex?
 
I wonder where is this great classroom where birds & bugs fly around freely? The Karate-chop/speed-erasing/human-platform formation in the middle looks like a very complex piece of choreography.
 
Sea Monkey just ran out the door to teach her class...
 
hey kelli,
do you need another studio assistant? i don't drink coffee but i am really good at humoring other people's self delusions - I can promise that it will feel real, honest and genuine.
 
Anon, I could use a sycophant like you around the studio. Though occationally i like to beat my assistants senseless, will that be ok with you?
 
thith lookth like Thea Monkeyths clath.
If any clathroom hath birdths and inthects itths Thea monkeyths.
 
Patrick, I've never seen Keith Tyson's work in the flesh, but from what I've seen I feel like, eh, whatevs. Did he win the Turner prize? Actually don't answer that, i don't care. I've found studio assistants get in the way. I take up too much room it's true but I don't know how to use them and feel invaded and performative when someones in my studio.
 
I have no use for ass-istants in the studio (ass--ide from the fact that I can't afford them) but I would like someone to deliver coffee and donuts to me once a day...and then leave.
 
When I first moved to NY, I was a part-time studio assistant and had to paint perfect circles on a white ground. I ended up painting fuzzy-edged ovals...the artist was not happy.
 
Talk about your blood sweat and tears, I was an assistant to Mr. Humphery back when he was working on a larger scale. I had the sholders of Hercules, my hands were bloody pulp. Also tried to be Julian Schnabel's assistant but thats a story for another day.
I have an invisable friend in the studio but it (it's a robot) is always tired and just likes to sit and read.
 
Yeah, I was stretching big canvases and coming home with my hands all red and blistered. The artist still complained they weren't tight enough.
 
In some camps the complaining is customary. If Humphery ever complained I'd beat his scrawny lit'l art boy butt to a pulp.

I hope you got your bloody pulp all over Complaining Artist's canvas.
 
assistant offered to work for free & mend my clothes. she's an awesome artist. I pay her and gave her lecture on that androcentric John Norman crap. trying to come up with less demeaning name like "studio manager"
 
I hear you on the assistant thing, I read that keith tyson created this algorythm based on "all human knowledge" and he uses it to generate ideas for art and I was wondering if he actually executes the work or is it all machine like... whatever no need to know...
 
Kelli, I had to look up your john norman crap referance. Wow. Way too early for the planet Gor. How do you even know about that?!?!
 
I am learning the ways of Gor:

In Gorean mythology it is said that there was once a war between men and women and that the women lost, and that the Priest-Kings, not wishing the women to be killed, made them beautiful, but as the price of this gift decreed that they, and their daughters, to the end of time, would be the slaves of men....
---Dancer of Gor, 25:352
 
"...This belief is in no way an indication that the Gorean man does not like women, on the contrary, to Him, it is merely a fact of nature that man is the Dominant species and that woman isn't."

Phew. Men on Gor like woman. Sounds like an excellent destination for spring break
 
but who makes superior studio assistants? and do the artists on gor like to watch theie assistants bleed?
corny, i'm disappointed that while i was at work being a studio assistant yesterday, you offered me a job but by the time i woke up this morning, you had withdrawn the offer... what terrible timing.
oh well.
and has anyone been to simon's hardware on greenpoint avenue? this place is a total crap trap. it hasn't been cleaned since the year 2 and it is run by this really chatty and funny alta kocker. anyway, he is closing soon so i suggest a visit. i mean, i recommend a visit. don't miss simon's hardware on greenpoint avenue.
 
Kelli--you are always teaching us something new.
 
Thanks anon, as it happens i need to buy sandpaper today and your recomendation is noted. You can be virtual studio assistant. You are sometimes moody and your personality shifts unpredictably but I think we work well together.
 
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